in your facebook

by myjaundicedeye

in your facebook

I just read that facebook, the social media outlet for narcissists of all ages, is considering adding a “dislike” option. Well now we’re talking. However, MJE doesn’t think that goes nearly far enough. She’d like to kick negativity up to a whole new level and proposes a social media site strictly for the truthful airing of dirty little secrets. A place where you can “share” the embarrassing details of your interpersonal relationships with your family and friends, not the xmas letter fiction that no one believes….We’ve all read them, “Our youngest was accepted early decision at Princeton! “ really? We’re shocked, what with his being a fourth generation legacy and your six figure donation to build a new rec center. And his older brother “just got an incredible job!” It’s about time, he’s been living in your basement since he graduated from college in 2009. And the inevitable “adorable new grand baby”, give us a break, not only is your daughter unmarried but she doesn’t even know who the father is.

Let’s be honest, it’s the dirty laundry that genuinely interests us: the grown child who is a tattooed welfare diva, or the drug addicted nephew and his kleptomaniac sister. And do tell us about the five year old grandson who isn’t out of diapers, or the brother in law who is back in them. And don’t leave out a single detail about your boozehound mom who’s facing 60 days in the county jail on a DUI violation or your brother the priest who was recently defrocked for boinking altar boys in the vestry.

The very thought of having a constantly updated window into the other people’s miserable lives makes MJE’s heart sing. But I’m not alone, the Germans as a people enjoy it so much they even have a name for it, schadenfreude.

Look it up.