by myjaundicedeye


Sorry for the lengthy hiatus, MJE was in New Orleans for Mardi Gras and it takes everything I have just to survive. Of course, it’s all self-inflicted but debilitating none the less. As I always say, if something is worth doing it’s worth overdoing. And that goes double during Mardi Gras.

Bandoleira-Saturnalia came down from gotham city with her new boyfriend, Stefanolpolis who was tremendously excited about visiting the south for the first time. As much as she tried to convince him that New Orleans is not the south, despite it’s geography, he was probably expecting Big Daddy to great him at the front door of Tara in a white linen suit and panama hat, mint julep in hand. Instead he got the OB&C in clothes he’d worn for a week, wearing a cammo baseball cap and holding a coors light and a bag of pork rinds.

But he soldiered through, slurped down raw ersters at the oyster bar at Manales with Uptown T shucking and jiving throughout. Ate poboys for virtually every meal and in true mardi gras spirit drank too much and missed hearing Galactic at Tip’s. They dragged themselves to at least ten parades, enjoyed seeing the men “parading” in motorized naugahyde recliners, the camel toe stepper gals (think very tight spandex) and of course the six ten stompers, middle aged men in short basketball shorts, satin jackets, tennis headbands, tube sox and silver shoes. All that and they have dance moves beyonce would envy.

But now MJE is back in the “real” world and already officially completely and totally fed up with the “race to the white house”, which seems much more like the race to the out house. How to characterize the candidates? Trump is the blow hard self-important father in law who keeps telling you what a loser you are. Hillary is the cranky aunt who always has to have the last word. Bernie is your crazy uncle who emerges from his hoarder’s nest once a year at thanksgiving ranting about how materialistic you are and how you need to think about other people for once, you self-absorbed narcissist. Rubio is your ass kissing brother in law who makes everyone else look bad. Cruz is your scary cousin who makes your skin crawl and you try never to be alone with. Kasich is the even tempered kindly uncle you wish was your father. Jeb is the really, super nice brother who just ain’t got it and peaked as a VP in the local bank. And Ben Carson, the family’s idiot savant that absolutely no one can figure out.

So, take your pick. The repubs were hell bound to cut back funds for education. So now we are all stuck with no crazy uneducated, uninformed voter left behind.