be careful what you wish for
Praise the lord (as I suppose the conald has been doing a lot lately since being born again…too bad it wasn’t in another country and century) the GOP convention has finally come to an end. And not a moment too soon, if MJE had to hear from one more cretin in a funny hat yammering on about how the conald is the only savior for what ails this god forsaken country I would seriously consider puncturing my own ear drums.
Ted Cruz’s speech was a barn burner, unfortunately it was his own barn. He’s as slimy and self-serving a politico as I have ever had the misfortune to watch, with an ego that can go toe to toe with the conald’s. His self-absorbed rant about people voting their values and conscience accomplished what four grueling days of the convention could not, actually making the conald look human. However, that’s a parlor trick you really can trot out just once because digging your own political grave while simultaneously elevating even further the biggest narcissistic gasbag in memory can’t be topped.
Now we know for certain that the conald is the ONLY person in this country who can solve the devastating conditions that plague our nation because he told us so. I must not have been paying attention because the landscape doesn’t look nearly as bleak as the conald described. But then again MJE always walks on the sunny side of the street, unless someone who looks sort of foreign happens to come along, then I hot foot it to the dark side until the threat passes. But if he’s right then my guess is that once inaugurated his first order of business (after gold plating all of the WH bathroom fixtures) will be to set up a cabinet post to design our own Hunger Games.
And poor Mike Pence, I never thought I would feel sorry for a guy who is straight out of central casting as a nazi storm trooper. He really must be one hellova needy individual to hitch his wagon to a sleaze ball who embodies the polar opposite of his purported principles, ideals and (christian) values, a man who’s ethics, if any, are as malleable as the filler in melamia’s lips. Mike, you sure better hope that jesus saves because buddy you are going to need it after making this faustian bargain.
I am guessing that as we have seen, the conald’s family will be very involved in his administration. Obviously, Ivanka has the chief of staff post nailed down and maybe head of the joint chiefs too. Eric is looking good for secretary of commerce, what with his business acumen selling trump wines to trump owned businesses. Tiffany’s a tough call, hmm, how about head of health and human services, she can be in charge of government-produced work out videos and testing new beauty products. Conald junior puts on a pretty swell show, got the swagger down, seems serious….how about ambassador to nato. Scratch that, forgot we don’t need nato. Then secretary of defense seems like a good slot for him, MJE is sure that he will be the steady hand and cool head when dear old dad gets pissed off and stomps off to the situation room with the nuclear codes.
Melania will have lots of time to fine-tune her sultry demeanor. Being first lady and running the white house is nothing compared to having to stay one step ahead of those wily trump kids.